I just completed a fabulous new diet.
I lost a ton of weight, but I can’t recommend it all of you. It’s one of those things that just isn’t for everyone. You have to be one of the chosen to try it.
It’s called the Strep Throat Diet.
First Max tried it. Skin and bones. You could see his ribcage poking through in no time. I’m not so sure it’s great for kids. He was just on it for a week. (Yes, this is the same kid who cracked his head open the first week of March. We’re talking about the second week now.)
After Max lost all that weight, I just had to give it a whirl, so I jumped on the Strep Throat Diet. Five pounds just slid right off my body effortlessly. It is so easy to stay on this diet because not only is swallowing excruciating, but the motivation to eat (or live) is so diminished that food was the last thing on my mind. I didn’t even finish a meager bowl of soup. What’s more, you don’t even have to exercise on this plan. Just roll around moaning in bed and you’ve completed your daily activity quotient. Unfortunately the diet ran its course before I reached my ultimate weight loss goal.
Oh well, I hear there’s also a Virus Diet creeping around the It crowd. Maybe I can hop on that to shed my final ten.
(Photo circa 2010. We don’t take pictures every time we’re sick.)