The recent tragedy in Tuscon presents not only political and security problems, but also a spiritual challenge for our country: How do we cultivate peace in times of such senseless adversity?
Our gut response to such violence is horror, grief and rage. Those emotions are natural and certainly have a place; however, to do better, we must move beyond them. To allow ourselves to be filled with hate, even towards people who deserve to be hated, is to do ourselves and our country irreparable damage. We must keep our hearts clean.
Let me get specific. Ever since my husband and I became parents, stories about kidnapping, abuse and murder have become unbearable to watch, especially when the victim is a little boy. The love we have for our Max and our Jack has taught us the value of life in an inarticulate way I’m sure every parent can understand. When the news reports these horrific crimes, Andres gets agitated. His body physically tenses. He can barely sputter out his vengeful thoughts of hate and retaliation. In fact, he was even outraged by the premise of the animated movie, Tangled. Unfamiliar with the Rapunzel fairytale, he was horrified that the little girl had been kidnapped for eighteen years, her parents missing her terribly for all that time. I have different reaction to the same news reports. I get quiet, so quiet I can barely speak. I don’t want to hear about it, but a part of me feels I must stand witness in order to honor the victim. The thought that such grief could touch us, our little family, is unbearable.
We must move beyond rage. We must move beyond unspeakable sadness. We must move into a place where our hearts are full of peace, equanimity and love. I am thinking of the Budhist, Yogic and Christian leaders who have taught this: Jesus, the Dali Lama, Mother Teresa, Ghandi, Pope John Paul II. The word I hear, but don’t fully embrace yet, is: forgiveness.
Forgiveness doesn’t abate punishment. Forgiveness doesn’t excuse a lack of vigilance. Forgiveness means keeping our hearts clean. If the word catches in your heart, the way it does in mine, discard it. All we need is the understanding of what it means to forgive.
Whatever practical and political precautions need to take place to punish this crime and prevent similar attacks in the future are necessary and good. But on a spiritual level, we have to challenge ourselves to remain at peace. How do we do that?
Well, I am certainly not going to solve the dilemna of world peace in a blog post, but there are a few things I do know. Hated is a virus. Rage not only expresses, but also creates pain. Sorrow is a natural response to loss, but grief is a failure to accept what it. (Amrit Desai) If our response to tragedy is to blacken our hearts, we will be forever lost. In the end, it is about retaining the integrity of love in the center of our beings.
If we want, we must be peace.
If we want love, we must be love.
I am reminded of a road trip I took in college. It was from Spokane, Washington to Ogdan, Utah for the National Undergraduate Literature Conference with three other budding writers. It happened to be Easter weekend and I found a church to celebrate the candlelit Vigil mass Saturday night. The church was bilingual, a first for me. The mass was long, but magical. Converts were fully immersed in baptismal water. Girls in Spanish lace dresses received their first communion. I couldn’t register half of what was spoken, but I knew the ritual, so I understood. At one point a soprano began chanting in pure, clear voice, “Create in me a clean heart.” The whole congregation joined in the chant and that beautiful, but simple idea of creating a clean heart took root inside of me.
We left very early the next morning, wanting to be with our families for Easter dinner. We crossed Montana near dawn. Snow and frost from the still lingering winter covered the ground. Buffalo came to the fence and shrugged at us as we passed by. The four poets in the car were lost in thought and I could hear the silence of a new day cracking through the darkness. And then, only in my head, the soprano from the night before:
Create in me a clean heart.
That is the beginning, the initial impulse, the first step towards purity that will keep us all safe and loved.
Beautiful!